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The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to Memes@lemmy.ml · hace 3 años

Mandatory bees

startrek.website

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Mandatory bees

startrek.website

The Picard Maneuver@startrek.website to Memes@lemmy.ml · hace 3 años
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  • FUCKRedditMods@lemm.ee
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    hace 3 años

    Maybe it’s just late, but this one-two punch of randomness and absurdity just got me good. Still giggling.

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      It’s about to be 2pm here and I’m laughing hard so it’s not just you and not just the late hour 🤣

    • OrekiWoof@lemmy.ml
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      hace 3 años

      I’ve been giggling at this since I saw this in the morning. I’m trying to fall asleep now and I’m still here

  • saltnotsugar@lemm.ee
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    hace 3 años

    We’re a collaboration first company, and that’s why the “Bees in my desk!” policy works for us. Nothing brings us closer than the sudden release of bees at our corporate headquarters. Some of you will feel some resistance to the idea, but an anonymous poll overwhelmingly approved of it. We look forward to a sudden swarm at our next mandatory town hall meeting.

    • KoboldCoterie@pawb.social
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      hace 3 años

      Important Policy Update: As part of our continued commitment to being an inclusive work environment, we’ve elected to expand our popular ‘Bees in my desk!’ policy to also include paper wasps, yellow jackets, and tarantula hawks! Please look forward to the roll-out of this new and improved policy starting on Monday!

      • gibmiser@lemmy.world
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        hace 3 años

        Judge all you want, but the paper wasps and tarantula hawks are a real improvement.

        Yellow jackets can fuck right off though.

        • Catoblepas@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          hace 3 años

          Yeah, you have to try to get tarantula hawks to bother you (unless you’re a tarantula), and paper wasps have a pretty small aggression radius.

      • xX_fnord_Xx@lemmy.world
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        hace 3 años

        After Thursday, all employees will be required measures the amount of honey(nectar) that is gathered by their desk hive.

    • SamsungAppleOnePlus@lemm.ee
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      hace 3 años

      Can confirm I’m more efficient when collaborating with others when the bees are released.

    • Soleil (she/her ♀)@beehaw.org
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      hace 3 años

      Hwhat’s this? An overabundance of bees in the workplace? My briefcase full of bees ought to put a stop to that!

    • OpenStars@kbin.social
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      hace 3 años

      But resistance is fu…n? :-P

    • Lurker123 [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      hace 3 años

      Hey there team members!

      I hope you all had a wonderful Labor Day weekend. Now that you’re back in the office, I’m sure some you are picking up on the new “buzz” around town. I bet some of you can’t even “bee-lieve” it!

      Yasss queen, using some of our pizza party budget, we’ve installed all natural honey dispensers into everybody’s desk! But remember to “beehive” yourself and not take too much, so as to not upset our flying friends (Darrell, we’re all wishing you a speedy recovery!).

      Anyway, that’s enough “droning” on from me.

      Bee seeing you! -hr

  • chillbo_baggins@lemm.ee
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    hace 3 años

    You cannot stop her. Prepare for bees.

    • Natanael@slrpnk.net
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      hace 3 años

      That Oprah meme has evolved huh

  • MartinXYZ@sh.itjust.works
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    hace 3 años

    “I like my women like I like my coffee… COVERED IN BEES!”

    • Holzkohlen@feddit.de
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      hace 3 años

      Does this fetish have a name? Just so I can explicitely avoid it.

      • RIPandTERROR@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        hace 3 años

        oviposition

      • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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        hace 3 años

        Not (to my knowledge) a fetish , just an Eddie Izzard line from the aptly named stand up special Glorious 😁

  • AeonFelis@lemmy.world
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    hace 3 años

    Why would you want to stop her? Don’t you want the bee crisis to be resolved?

  • Mr_Blott@feddit.ukdeleted by creator
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    hace 3 años

    Big if true

    • RQG@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      Large if fa… Wait this isn’t reddit.

      • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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        hace 3 años

  • son_named_bort@lemmy.world
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    hace 3 años

    Does she have dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark bees fly out?

    • xX_fnord_Xx@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      Smithers, release the hounds.

    • WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      Release the robotic Richard Simmons.

  • beteljuice@lemmy.ml
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    hace 3 años

    Ugh I read “orifice” instead of “office” at first.

    • The Picard Maneuver@startrek.websiteOP
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      hace 3 años

      Is that a dealbreaker?

      • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.ml
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        hace 3 años

        I wouldn’t wish harm on the bees, maybe bees is a product name for a vibrator though. If it’s not it should be.

  • nul42@lemmy.ca
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    hace 3 años

    Not the Bees!

  • LEDZeppelin@lemmy.worlddeleted by creator
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    hace 3 años

    Does she work at Applebees?

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      Only if the bees are strictly proprietary and designed to stop working after a few years.

  • WtfEvenIsExistence1️@lemmy.cadeleted by creator
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    hace 3 años

    BEEHAW!

  • Hatandwatch [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    hace 3 años

    Mandatory bees nutz

  • Sabre363@sh.itjust.works
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    hace 3 años

    She can put bees in my office wink wink

  • CelloMike@startrek.website
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    hace 3 años

    Later that very same year, on International Bring a Shit-Ton of Bees to Work Day

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=PYtXuBN1Hvc&si=T9Ri-aaA7KWYS5a3

    • PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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      hace 3 años

      Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/watch?v=PYtXuBN1Hvc&

      Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

      I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.

    • BobbyNevada@discuss.tchncs.de
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      hace 3 años

      I feel we have made a terrible mistake!

      https://youtu.be/hBZmQdFbVcY?si=U3z1f4hEkjl4uwJk

      • PipedLinkBot@feddit.rocksB
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        hace 3 años

        Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

        https://piped.video/hBZmQdFbVcY?si=U3z1f4hEkjl4uwJk

        Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

        I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.

  • dan1101@lemm.ee
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    hace 3 años

    We have top men working on it. Top. Men.

    But yeah we probably can’t stop her.

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world
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      hace 3 años

      Are they the ones in charge of the British clothing chain?

      • WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world
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        hace 3 años

        No, but their weapon is strong against Shadow Man (kinda useless in every other situation, though.)

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