“Nobody wants to parkour their way through our application obstacle course for (a chance at) a probationary position with shit pay and no benefits that we can yank away at any time because we don’t like the color of tie they wore during our mandatory unpaid off-hours team building event.”

Congratulations on your new cat. 4 isn’t that much bigger of a number than 3, after all.

ESPN rents antenna space on that thing.

It’s a pile of meowlch to inhibit weed growth and retain moisture.

A fellow Ultron user in the wild, #1 hacker and cyber-thief browser on the web. How’s your Adobe Reader?

Great, thank you for your research but do you have any audiophile jazz salt?

Seems like the kind of thing a person does when they understand technology well enough to use it badly but don’t recognize that it’s ineffective against anyone willing to type “enable right click” into their search engine of choice.

How much do you want to bet that they didn’t write the JavaScript for that message and it’s just been copied and edited? Probably even right-clicked to do it, the scalawag.

Don’t take the bait, there are a thousand little knives that will appear out of nowhere when you get close enough to touch.

A good slingshot will get you some distance but a PVC cannon fueled by hair spray is a lot more fun.

Yeah, just having a little fun in the role of a paranoid admin. My setup isn’t worth mentioning since it fits my threat model (i.e. nobody gives a shit about my network, just don’t be the low hanging fruit) but I’m interested in other replies. Hope you get some useful responses here.

Nice try, attacker trying to get me to do their reconnaissance work for them. I’m on to you.

A member in VAG is great and all but if your quality control isn’t effective and you start slipping, pretty soon you’ll really be in the shit.

Your FSB handler must be the type to reward activity instead of efficacy. Hope that Kremlin monopoly money is worth it.

Everybody’s in here complaining but the app just wanted to show its user the rip in space and time it discovered just down the street.

Found this excerpt from a documentary on the subject of feline mental health.

It’s easy, like this, watch:

Yes.

Shit, you’re right.

Here’s a higher-quality version. I decided not to be satisfied with GIMP’s mangling of the GIF since it was being converted to an MP4 on upload anyway.

That cat knows how to party.

“…and his small heart grew three sizes that day, to which his doctor responded that he was ‘astonishingly healthy’ and ‘the healthiest grinch ever’. Then he had a massive coronary brought on by decades of fast food and a sedentary lifestyle.”

Hope things go well and your friend is receptive to the message. It might not change the trajectory right away but at the very least, it’ll be something to encourage them to examine their habits. If your friend does seem to take it to heart but has a hard time cutting back, there’s a medication called naltrexone which may help reduce alcohol cravings. I’m just some internet guy though so that’s more of a conversation between them and their doctor, it’s something I didn’t know about before starting treatment but I think it was helpful. Carbonated (seltzer/sparkling) water was useful as a replacement for the alcoholic drinks in my case but if that brings to mind stuff they used to mix together, it may not be an ideal solution.

If they’ve been drinking heavily over a long period, there are also some risks associated with complete cessation so it couldn’t hurt to encourage them to schedule an appointment with their doctor anyway. I’d imagine that’s come up in your research already though.